Well, I went in for my ultrasound today, and the doc couldn’t get a good “look” at things with her little internal device. Therefore, she transfered me to the radiology department who has a much bigger machine.
To make a long story short, the baby seems only to be about 4-5 weeks old, impossible for me to feel any movement at this stage. What I’ve been feeling is most likely “gas” pressing up against the enlarged uterus. They couldn’t even get the baby to say “cheese” on the pics. All they could see was a gestational sac. Now, there was a light grayish “something” in there, so they don’t believe it’s an empty sac with nothing growing in it, so that’s good.
I’m to go back in two weeks’ time for another internal ultrasound when the baby is a mite bigger, and then they can get a good look at fetal heartbeat and actually measure the fetus to determine exact age. Right now, they’re guesstimating, since they couldn’t see the baby on the ultrasound.
Now, the interesting thing is that when the tech was doing the procedure, there were two dark areas in my uterus. In fact, in one picture she took, she typed some medical jargon with a question mark and two arrows pointing to both dark areas.
Of course, she was just a tech and couldn’t give me any real answers, as only the radiologist is “qualified” to read the ultrasounds. My doctor (nice lady btw) called me at about 5:20pm this evening (after hours, very cool) and told me all of the above. I thought it odd that the tech was taking so long with the procedure, but she assured me it was only because they couldn’t find my ovaries, and thus gave up trying to find them. I was freaking out a little bit wondering what was going on when the tech left the room to consult with the radiologist, but I was assured it was the issue of the hiding ovaries. Okay.
So I asked the doctor if the two dark spots meant two babies. She said it’s too early to tell at this point, since they couldn’t see much of anything beyond the sac. There’s definitely one in there, I saw it. The questionable one is the second, so we’ll see. Of course, I’m not skilled in the art of reading ultrasounds, so for all I know, it could have been anything. It’s not like I can make anything out on those pictures unless someone draws a diagram.
But the thing that gets me is the seemingly impossibility of my being able to feel movement. If the baby is so young, there is no way I could feel movement, since it really doesn’t move much until it’s nervous system is online and it has some muscle mass in later weeks. But even then it’s so small that chances of feeling it are slim. So am I just feeling gas? The doctor says yes. DH is skeptical that I’m feeling the baby. But it feels exactly the same, I’m telling you.
Imagine taking an inflated balloon and somehow putting your hand inside of it. Now, if you move your fingers against the inside of the balloon and pretend you could feel that inside of you, that’s what it feels like. Strange comparison, I know, but that’s about the best I can do for describing what fetal movement feels like. If you could feel what’s happening to that balloon and then run your fingers along the inside of it, that’s about it. Flutters, rolling, pushing, pressure.
For now, I guess I’ll just take everyone’s word for it and concede that it’s probably gas rolling about, pressing against the uterus. But it “feels” like everyone’s calling me a liar. It’s not movement. Couldn’t possibly be movement. Baby’s too small. You’re just feeling what you want to feel.
No one’s said that last sentence to me, but that’s the kind of feeling I get. It’s disappointing in a way, too, as I was starting to become connected to the baby’s “movements” and excited whenever I would feel that affirmation of life inside of me… only to find… it’s nothing more than air moving around, tricking me.
Last time I checked, gas didn’t feel like baby movement. I’ve NEVER mistaken being gassy with being pregnant before. And if my gas ever did feel like baby movement, it probably would have freaked me out on more than one occasion. Nine times out of ten, I deal with my gas with a Phazyme. LOL This isn’t the same kind of full or bloaty feeling you get. It’s “rolling”, “fluttering”, and sometimes, a slow, easy pressing. I don’t know, maybe it is just digestion. But I didn’t think I would be this disappointed to be proven wrong.
~~Becka
http://www.RebeccaGoings.com
Each new character creates a certain visual that stays with you throughout the book…and forever after. In writing Once A Rebel, I’ve already shared that I had Josh Bernstein (pictured left) in mind as the hero’s template. (Sorry, Galen doesn’t really resemble anyone that I can think of.) As I penned the congressman, the whole time I could just see Ted Levine as the ambitious politician, Theodore Cady. Not sure why, but something about his voice and look captured and held my interest.
It will take a while, but by Gawd, we WILL educate our children in the Star Trek canon. A true geek cannot do otherwise. Besides, it’s not like there’s ANYTHING ELSE to watch on TV nowadays. 
